Anger: An Emotion Worth Listening To…

Anger is an emotion that many of us have learned to fear, suppress, or judge. We may have been taught that being angry is unacceptable, that we should “calm down” or let things go.

Some of us have grown up experiencing anger being used as a weapon, to abuse and control. So we learn to stay well away from this emotion for fear of history repeating itself and the damage this could cause. 

Although, anger isn’t always destructive or dangerous. It is a natural human emotion which can carry necessary information.

Anger can alert us to something that feels wrong or important. It may arise when our boundaries have been crossed, when we feel dismissed or unheard, when we experience injustice, or when our needs aren’t being met. Sometimes, beneath anger, there may also be feelings of pain, fear, sadness, disappointment, or helplessness.

Sometimes, the work is in learning that we are allowed to be angry. That we can be angry without hurting ourselves or someone else. And sometimes, it is discovering that beneath the anger is a part of us that has been waiting for a very long time to be heard.

When we suppress our anger, it can lay dormant within us, but slowly it can build up until our anger leaks out in ways that we can’t often control. Snapping at our children, our partners, shouting at a stranger who cuts in front of us on the street. 

But maybe the solution is not to make our anger disappear, or to just try changing our mindset. Perhaps instead we can learn to listen to our anger with curiosity, compassion, and allow it to show us something important about what we need, what we value, and where our boundaries lie. We can learn to safely and healthily express our anger with our whole bodies, talking, moving, connecting and feeling. 

If you are interested in exploring your own feelings of anger, feel free to get in touch for a free 20 minute consultation with me via my homepage here:

https://www.gemmamariecounselling.com

#anger #counselling #westsussex